My Elephant Thinks I'm Wonderful
My elephant thinks I'm wonderful.
My elephant thinks I'm cool.
My elephant hangs around with me
and follows me into school.
My elephant likes the way I look.
He thinks that I'm fun and smart.
He thinks that I'm kind and generous
and have a terrific heart.
My elephant thinks I'm brave and bold.
He's proud of my strength and guts.
But mostly he likes the way I smell.
My elephant thinks I'm nuts.
--Kenn Nesbitt
I'm Building a Rocket
I'm building a rocket.
As soon as I'm done
I'm taking my friends
on a trip to the sun.
But what to you mean
that the sun is too hot?
Oh well, I suppose
I'll just pick a new spot.
I'm building a rocket.
I'm finishing soon
and taking my friends
on a trip to the moon!
But what do you mean
that the moon has no air?
Well dang, then I guess
that we can't go up there.
I'm building a rocket.
It's going to fly.
I'm taking my friends
way up high in the sky.
But what do you mean
when you ask how we'll land?
This rocket is harder
to build than I planned.
To heck with the rocket.
It's out in the shed.
I'm taking my friends
out for pizza instead.
--Kenn Nesbitt
Lousy Catcher's Mitt
I bought myself a catcher's mitt
so I could catch a ball.
But all I ever caught were things
I didn't want at all.
I caught a fish, I caught a cab;
just how I can't explain.
I caught my brother telling lies,
I even caught a train.
I caught a show, I caught a crook,
I caught the evening news.
I caught my sister kissing boys,
and then I caught a snooze.
Come see my lousy catcher's mitt:
a wonder to behold!
I've never caught a single ball,
and now I've caught a cold!
--Kenn Nesbitt
The Drinking Fountain
The drinking fountain squirted me.
It shot right up my nose.
It felt as if I'd stuck my nostril
on the garden hose.
It squirted water in my eye
and also in my ear.
I'm having trouble seeing
and it's really hard to hear.
The water squirted east and west.
It squirted north and south.
Upon my shirt, my pants, my hair,
but nothing in my mouth.
I'm sure that soon they'll fix it
but, until then, let me think...
just who can I convince that they
should come and have a drink?
--Kenn Nesbitt
Brandon Branson's Backpack
Brandon Branson's backpack
is unusually large.
He drags it into school
the way a tugboat drags a barge.
The main compartment holds
about a hundred hardback books.
The outside has a zillion
little pockets, strap and hooks.
Inside it has his calculators,
one for every class,
plus eighty markers, pens and pencils,
adding to it's mass.
It holds his new harmonica
plus three or four kazoos,
his binder and his lunchbox
and an extra pair of shoes.
Of course it has his mittens
with his winter coat and hat,
a soccer ball, a basketball,
a baseball glove and bat.
A CD player, headphones,
and a TV, with remote,
a telephone, computer,
and another hat and coat.
His skateboard and his scooter
have their own equipment rack.
It even has a space to park
his bicycle in back.
A teacher found it in the hall
today at 1:15,
She looked around for Brandon
who was nowhere to be seen.
She got some other teachers
who considered it and frowned,
then groaned and moaned and pulled
and dragged it off to lost and found.
They struggled through the doorway
feeling out of breath and strained,
and all of them were curious
to see what it contained.
They cautiously unzipped it
and they pulled it open wide,
and there was Brandon Branson
napping happily inside.
--Kenn Nesbitt
Bernina's Band-Aids
Bernina had a Band-Aid
on her elbow and her chin,
her ankles, knees and forehead,
plus her shoulder and her shin.
Another two were on her ears
and ten were on her toes.
She'd one on every finger
and a big one on her nose.
Her Band-Aids were the coolest
that her friends had ever seen.
A few of them had leopard spots
and some were neon green.
A bunch were lit with lightning bolts,
or stars and crescent moons,
while some had superheroes
from the Saturday cartoons.
Bernina's now in trouble
for there's just one little catch;
she used up all the Band-Aids
but she didn't have a scratch.
--Kenn Nesbitt
Sea Monster's Complaint
My breakfast never varies;
it's the same thing every day.
And lunch and dinner likewise
make me yawn and turn away.
I'm craving something different.
I'm in need of something new.
Some pickles, some lasagna,
or a chocolate cake or two.
I'd like a dozen pizzas
and some carry-out Chinese,
a turkey, ham and pot roast
with potatoes, pies and peas.
I want a bag of burgers,
and a barrel full of rice.
I'll wash it down with twenty quarts
of soda pop on ice.
My taste buds need variety
to pass between my lips.
No more of just the same old thing!
I'm sick of fish and ships.
--Kenn Nesbitt
Terrible Dream
I'm feeling rather ragged.
I'm feeling rather rough.
I'm looking like I stayed up late,
and didn't sleep enough.
I went to sleep at bedtime
and dreamt all through the night,
but when I woke this morning
I was feeling far from right.
For though I drifted quickly,
and slumbered long and deep,
I'm totally exhausted
'cause I dreamed I couldn't sleep!
--Kenn Nesbitt
Silly Footprints
by Arden Davidson
I spent years
searching for a
six-footed camel.
I'd never seen it,
but I knew it existed,
'Cause I'd seen
its footprints
in the sand,
but every time
I got close,
I missed it.
I studied its
footprints in the hot,
summer sun
and everything
seemed just fine
until I realized
four footprints were his
and two of them
were mine!
Flying Popcorn
Arden Davidson
A piece of popcorn
escaped from the pan
and flew across the kitchen
like Superman.
It ping-ponged back and forth
between the oven and the freezer.
Then it shot up to the ceiling
like a daredevil trapeezer.
I tried and tried to catch it,
but it never missed a trick.
So finally I gave up
and ate a licorice stick.
Color Me Happy!
by Arden Davidson
If I were the color blue,
I'd sing sad songs for you.
If I were the color yellow,
I'd be a happy fellow.
If I were the color red
I'd look like me when I bled.
If I were the color green,
I'd grow like a big string bean.
If I were the color brown,
I'd be a chocolate town.
If I were the color pink,
I'd be a lemony drink.
If I were the color purple,
Nothing would rhyme with me.
Sent To My Room
Arden Davidson
I broke a dish
and mom got mad.
She sent me to my room
because she said that I was bad.
So I'm sitting here
on my canope
with my stereo
and my color tv
and my favorite doll
and my 'lectric train
and my building blocks
and my video game,
And I'm wondering what
my mother meant
when she said my room
was a punishment.
What To Do About Grandma
Arden Davidson
When grandma goes to sleep at night,
I shut all the windows and doors.
I put cotton in my ears because, well,
my grandma snores.
She snores so loud it jiggles the house
and makes the shutters shake.
One time our neighbors ran out screaming -
they thought there was an earthquake.
Another time she snored so loud
our ears and noses bled.
Now everyone runs for cover
when my grandma goes to bed.
Yes, grandma's known for snoring.
She's known all over town.
Even power saws and freight trains
tell my grandma to pipe down.
She's louder than a motor bike
or a great big thunder clap.
Oh dear! Oh no! I've got to go!
It's time for grandma's nap!
The Hard Way
Arden Davidson
I've got a rabbit's foot
and a four leaf clover.
A lucky penny
and a troll named Dover.
I've crossed my fingers,
I've wished on stars.
And for extra
safe measures,
I've wished on Mars.
I've avoided all ladders
and black cats as well.
Even went to a witch
for a fifty cent spell.
Now I'm armed
and I'm ready
to do my best.
Next time I'll just study
for my history test.
Rich Kid
Arden Davidson
I found a quarter in a pay phone.
Boy, am I excited!
I'm feeling mighty, mighty rich
and I don't plan to hide it.
I think I'll buy a baseball.
Hmmmm. I don't have quite enough.
Instead I'll buy a rag doll.
Boy, this shopping stuff is tough.
Okay, I'll buy a pizza.
No, I'm still a little shy.
How 'bout a bag of onion rings?
Well, it was worth a try.
I've searched for half the day now
for one thing I can afford,
and now I have to tell you
that I'm growing rather bored.
I guess I'll buy some gumballs
so that I can finally end it.
It's amazing how long a quarter lasts
when you can't afford to spend it.
POPCORN
Popcorn at the movies.
Popcorn at the game.
Popcorn just for snacking.
Popcorn's not the same!
Now it comes in flavors,
Caramel, nacho cheese.
I love all the flavors.
Pass the popcorn please!
Linda Holliman |
